You Have Won Me

I believe that every Christian has a special message to give to the body of Christ. A message unique to that individual. A life message on one of the qualities of who God is. A divine experiential revelation of the character of God.
I listened once to Kim walker (in case you don’t know she is a singer for the worship band, Jesus Culture) preach a message about what worship meant to her. There was something she shared in that message I have never heard from anyone else. I had never heard anyone else describe that aspect of God like she did. And this wasn’t something deeply theological. It was very simple, but it was beautiful. She spoke about this offense we can sometimes have that prevents us from connecting to God the way we should as his kids. What she shared touched my heart in a way that left me speechless.
I would like to give a piece of my heart to the world today by maybe sharing some of my friendship experiences with the Father. All my life I have always heard, ‘Jesus loves you’. Yes I knew that in my head but when it came to my heart, I wasn’t quite sure I understood. It didn’t make it better for my head when I read the verse where David writes a love letter from his heart to the Father and he said, ‘Your loving-kindness is better than life’. For the first time, my head didn’t understand something that my heart did. In the past this was always the complete opposite but No, not anymore. This was the turning point in my life. My heart could understand what my head couldn’t. I knew His loving-kindness was better than life. I knew in my heart that He really did love me.
From that day onward, I started having a very deep intimate fellowship as the Son brought the Father to sup with me. During these times when His presence was so thick around me, the Father started to pour his love abroad in my heart by His Holy Spirit. I started to know there was more than I knew. There was more about this God I had never known. At the centre of His very being was love. I started to realize that when John said God himself is love, he wasn’t merely writing some words from his head. He was speaking of a mystery that had been revealed in his heart. A mystery that existed before the foundation of the world. The mystery of the love that existed between the Father and the Son even before they even thought to create the heavens and the earth. I started to realize that God didn’t create everything he did just because he was lonely. Love was shared between the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The Lord started to teach me about the movements of his heart when there was no one and nothing but the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit. Daily, the Son was the Father’s delight. His heart was moved by the heart of His only begotten beloved son in whom His very self was pleased. He started to invite me to look into the pleasures of His heart. He started to show me what really mattered to Him. When Moses asked him to show him His glory how did He show Moses His glory? The Lord declared the name of the Lord as He said, ‘THE LORD! THE LORD! A GOD MERCIFUL AND GRACIOUS, SLOW TO ANGER, AND ABUNDANT IN LOVING-KINDNESS AND TRUTH’. I started to behold the glory of the Father in Jesus. The same glory he showed to Moses, except something more superior, as He had demonstrated His love in sending down His well beloved son to die for a stupid sinner. Imagine the horrors of separation of Jesus from His Father. Imagine how difficult it was for the Father to turn his face away and see His beloved crucified by sinners. Not any type of death, but death on a cross! The worst type of death that any man could have. Cursed is the man that is hung on a tree. The very creator was hung on the cross by his creation and was cursed to redeem His creation from the curse of the fall at the beginning. The Holy Spirit testified about these things to me. But not in a way to impart me with mere theological knowledge, but in a way that the knowledge of the love of Christ- the depth, height , breadth, width, was being revealed to my heart.
I believe it is crucial to every Christian to come to a revelation on the love of God. When you start to know how much God loves you, you start to love him more the way you should, then you start to love yourself the way he loves you, and lastly love other people as much as you love yourself. This was the whole point of all the laws in the Old Testament. They were given because God cared about his people and he loved them. They were not given because God wanted to make it hard for man to obey Him. This was why Jesus said the summary of all the Old Testament laws was love.
I had another experience that changed the way I viewed God totally. There was a time I was not sure if God heard me when I prayed. I thought to myself, ‘He’s so busy with the whole world I doubt if he actually hears me when I talk’. And I know God is omnipresent and He has promised that he is always with us, but I just didn’t believe it. I never said it out but I kept thinking this in my heart. One afternoon, as I was thinking like this again, the Holy Spirit said quietly, ‘I formed you with my own hands in your mother’s womb. I know you more than you can ever imagine’. After he said that, I had this vision of the Father forming me in my mother’s womb. As he formed me he was so deeply focused on what he was doing. He would even smile and was so fascinated by what He was doing. Then after he formed a part of me, he would pause and he would be so full of joy by that part of me. This was just like when He created the universe and He always stopped to behold what he had created and the Bible says, ‘He saw that it was good’. Even to the last detail as He formed the hairs of my head, He would take his time on each of them. This experience showed me the true meaning of what Jesus spoke about when He said we were of more value than sparrows and that the very hairs of our heads are numbered. Of course He knew that because he counted them himself alongside His Father. The experience also showed me the depth of the revelation the psalmist spoke about when He wrote,

‘Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God- you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration-what a creation! You know me inside out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing to something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day’(- Psalm 139:13-16 The Message Version). Lastly, the experience also showed me how concerned God is with my entire life. Not just the things I talk about but the things he hears me whisper to myself in my heart.

The love of God can never be overemphasized. It is something the bride of Christ has to be rooted into to bring her into her full glory- without spot, wrinkle of blemish.